Once upon a time there was a character called Sarah. As part of her journey to find truth she signed up to the Liberation Unleashed (LU) forum which helps guide seekers towards and through the ‘Gateless Gate’ i.e. to awakening. She took 16 pages to Gate. That’s 3 ½ months of looking on a daily basis, 3 ½ months of questioning, of finger pointing, of one to one work, of very precise one to one work. Then …..it stops. Or does it?
Previous to LU Jed McKenna had ripped open her head and stomped all over her beliefs with questions, but they weren’t precise, personal or specific to ‘Sarah’, or so she thought. But the habit of writing had started. She would read a question or statement and write about it. Writing helped her ‘see’ it. It allowed her to splurge thoughts and it forced her to look. You see, Sarah was full of fear and she clung to this story of control for dear life. Anything but look at what was really going on. She spent 46 years listening to a voice that had no more control than a lift telling you what floor you were on. That habit can take a while to see in all its nuances.
Whilst fiction reading fell away post-gate, non-duality books didn’t. Sarah had not read much prior to LU, but the book she needed always came. The next thing that needed to be looked at would be there. And so looking didn’t stop. Upon Gating she downloaded an article on the LU website, ‘The Awakened’s Guide to the Galaxy’ which was reread multiple times. She also used Rupert Spira’s questions about fear many times. Byron Katie’s questions were very useful for identifying stories and getting used to seeing them everywhere. ‘I Am That’ by Sri Nisargadatta was brilliant for looking at habit. And so it went, one book after another carried on pointing and Sarah carried on looking. Slowly, slowly, bit by bit looking increased. For instance, Sarah had never been able to look at work, now she does, one particular area that supplies endless looking. She has been looking especially at ‘what to do’. The answer came from ‘Ordinary Freedom’ by Jon Bernie: ‘You just do the next thing. The next thing is what’s right in front of us, right now’.
Looking always follows the similar pattern – who or what does this emotion or feeling belong to and is there a reference point? And so Sarah now notices that bits have dropped off that once were there. A habit here and an opinion there, a reaction here and a judgement there, a story here and a belief there. She doesn’t know when they went or where, she just knows that they have.
Loved the lift voice.
Thanks for this. I feel I am this woman as I have struggled in the same ways, looking for the right book, etc. And it always comes down to who or what is looking or having this issue or whatever. Look!
And yet I still ask “how to look, and where (the right place). Any comment would be appreciated. thanks
Hi Paul. To be honest the books just turned up. I sort of felt there was a query or question that seemed to hang around for quite a while, then when I stopped thinking about it or forgot about it, the answer would appear. It may even be only one sentence that is relevant, with the rest of the book not. I used to do lots of reading around this subject but don’t now.
To address the looking issue though, another word might be notice instead of look. Notice what is happening at this given moment. What senses do you notice? What sensations? What thoughts? But rather than following the content of thoughts, imagine they are clouds passing in the sky, what kind are they. E.g. a judgement thought, a critical thought, a future thought etc. Then ask your self which did ‘you’ do? Which did you create? Where from? Out of what? Or did they just appear? And disappear? What is permanent? Or is all ever changing?
Noticing what is happening may take a while to catch! Sometimes it’s during, but when starting out it might be after. Doesn’t matter. Forgetting might happen too!